$Microsoft(MSFT)$ the Swiss Army knife of tech—carves up cloud cash with Azure (AWS’s gym buddy), turns Office 365 subs into a Netflix-for-Excel addiction, and slaps AI glitter on everything via OpenAI’s brainwaves.
Satya’s out here Zen-ing through antitrust side-eye while buying Activision to ensure Xboxers never touch grass. When your OS is the planet’s Ctrl-Print Money button, I’m riding this Clippy-shaped rocket. 📈💼
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